Hogganjin is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, happy otter.

Hogganjin created the universe three million years ago.

If you believe in Hogganjin, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hogganjin, he will ignore you.

Hogganjin's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Hogganjin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about lentils.

2. Never paint your head yellow.

3. Never eat turnips.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Erect a giant tin sculpture of Hogganjin in the centre of the settlement.