Listlappark is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, uncaring giraffe.

Listlappark created a photon twelve years ago.

If you believe in Listlappark, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Listlappark, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Listlappark's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Listlappark's Holy Commandments

1. Never point your chest toward the east during prayer.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate rats.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always make sure there are no horses in a room before entering it.

5. Do not shave your face.