Xenyamlop is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, cheerful hare.

Xenyamlop created the Milkyway six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Xenyamlop, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Xenyamlop, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Xenyamlop's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Xenyamlop's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Worship no other gods but Xenyamlop.

3. Do not keep four pigs in a large pit.

4. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near frogs while wearing cyan tights and balancing seven titanium spheres on your face.

5. Never bounce near horses.