Weelaplad is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, astonishing narwhal.

Weelaplad created the cosmos five million years ago.

If you believe in Weelaplad, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Weelaplad, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Weelaplad's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Weelaplad's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into mauve rooms.

2. Never record numbers.

3. Always cleanse oil with water.

4. Do not gather at wells at dawn.

5. Do not speak about garlic.