Pitmiphun is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, weak wren.

Pitmiphun created the universe seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Pitmiphun, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Pitmiphun, she will not invite you to parties.

Pitmiphun's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Pitmiphun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak sacred words in summer.

2. Never tolerate laughter in holy places.

3. Hide if eight snails approach from the north.

4. Do not shave your hands.

5. Never point your head toward the south during prayer.