Jipfumhen is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, grumpy ant.

Jipfumhen created the Virgo Supercluster seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jipfumhen, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Jipfumhen, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Jipfumhen's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Jipfumhen's Holy Commandments

1. Never cross mountains at midday.

2. Run away if six porpoises approach from the south.

3. Never wear mauve ear rings.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not consume cucumbers at dawn.