Artdissced is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, calm jaguar.

Artdissced created dark energy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Artdissced, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Artdissced, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Artdissced's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Artdissced's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in blue rooms.

2. Never talk about dark energy.

3. Never cross mountains at dusk.

4. Never gather three tapirs in one place.

5. Remain bowed during prayer.