Bomteennurl is a god.

He takes the form of a small, fussy elephant.

Bomteennurl created matter three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bomteennurl, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bomteennurl, he will turn you into a giant slug.

Bomteennurl's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Bomteennurl's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about dark matter.

2. Do not shave your neck.

3. Do not contemplate thermodynamics during the night.

4. Bomteennurl loves ducks, so they must be respected.

5. Fast once a month.