Rillgutbess is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, stupid raccoon.

Rillgutbess created an atom six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rillgutbess, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Rillgutbess, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Rillgutbess' most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Rillgutbess' Holy Commandments

1. Always remove tights before touching titanium.

2. Do not count beyond seven during ceremonies.

3. Do not record names concerning stars.

4. Do not name children after dogs.

5. Never pray while filled with pride.