Basswap is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, almighty badger.

Basswap created a bottom quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Basswap, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Basswap, it will remove you from existence.

Basswap's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Basswap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your neck.

2. Do not dye your hair purple.

3. Always obey Basswap's priests.

4. Never write about nebulae.

5. Do not fashion tools from silicon.