Hunfatrancar is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, two-faced lion.

Hunfatrancar created Mount Everest eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Hunfatrancar, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Hunfatrancar, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Hunfatrancar's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Hunfatrancar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

3. You must pray to Hunfatrancar four times a day.

4. Dolphins are not to be trusted.

5. Do not drink water in green rooms.