Cepmapsand is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, kind dove.

Cepmapsand created the world six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cepmapsand, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Cepmapsand, he will turn you into a duck.

Cepmapsand's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Cepmapsand's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large iron sculpture of Cepmapsand on top of all buildings.

2. Cepmapsand must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Always remove scarves before touching carbon.

5. Never discuss eukaryotes in public assemblies.