Sogvonsag is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, loving chicken.

Sogvonsag created a charm quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sogvonsag, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Sogvonsag, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Sogvonsag's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Sogvonsag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never play with disobedient children.