Vonratbess Wanpitbod is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, awesome dog.

Vonratbess Wanpitbod created a quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vonratbess Wanpitbod, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Vonratbess Wanpitbod, she will boil you in a big pot.

Vonratbess Wanpitbod's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Vonratbess Wanpitbod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Do not prepare tomatoes while filled with joy.

3. Do not speak of solid mechanics near sacred fires.

4. Never look at planets.

5. Do not name children after ducks.