Gofhotfigvil is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, unjust lion.

Gofhotfigvil created the Sun four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gofhotfigvil, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Gofhotfigvil, he will manifest in front of you.

Gofhotfigvil's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Gofhotfigvil's Holy Commandments

1. Never leap in the presence of sheep.

2. Never eat lentils on holy days.

3. Never hurt horses.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never think about eukaryotes.