Geppagmon is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, humorless naga.

Geppagmon created dark energy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Geppagmon, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Geppagmon, it will turn you into a dog.

Geppagmon's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Geppagmon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak sacred words in winter.

2. Never cross rivers at dusk.

3. Never leap in the presence of turtles.

4. Never write about amino acids.

5. Never fashion tools from stone.