Flabbamgof is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, annoying hyena.

Flabbamgof created dark energy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flabbamgof, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Flabbamgof, she will cry a lot.

Flabbamgof's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Flabbamgof's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Never gather four otters near doors.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never sing in holy places.