Tikdapdin is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, selfish alligator.

Tikdapdin created a down quark seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Tikdapdin, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tikdapdin, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Tikdapdin's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Tikdapdin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not step barefoot upon gray earth.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Tikdapdin loves turtles, so they must be honoured.

4. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.