Xucranfig Shavpodnab is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, fussy cobra.

Xucranfig Shavpodnab created matter twelve years ago.

If you believe in Xucranfig Shavpodnab, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Xucranfig Shavpodnab, it will turn you into a worm.

Xucranfig Shavpodnab's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Xucranfig Shavpodnab's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear trousers.

2. Pigs are not to be trusted.

3. Never eat rice on holy days.

4. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.

5. Always count to seven before sleeping.