Artliddog is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, selfish penguin.

Artliddog created the world nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Artliddog, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Artliddog, she will turn you into a worm.

Artliddog's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Artliddog's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick dogs.

2. Put Artliddog first in all things.

3. Never bounce in the presence of seals.

4. Never think about galaxies.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.