Kopjadnat is a god.

It takes the form of a small, unselfish walrus.

Kopjadnat created an electron eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kopjadnat, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Kopjadnat, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Kopjadnat's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Kopjadnat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Always store corn above ground.

3. Always act with obedience when addressing children.

4. Always cleanse water with water.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate doves.