Wegquatzan is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, fast chinchilla.

Wegquatzan created energy three million years ago.

If you believe in Wegquatzan, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Wegquatzan, he will make you grow a tail.

Wegquatzan's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Wegquatzan's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear mauve rings on sacred days.

2. Always cleanse oil with water.

3. Never laugh in autumn.

4. Never think about quantum gravity near aardvarks while wearing violet trousers and balancing seven silver spheres on your feet.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.