Bossyartsog is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, compassionate deer.

Bossyartsog created the planet Mars eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bossyartsog, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Bossyartsog, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Bossyartsog's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Bossyartsog's Holy Commandments

1. Never discuss chlorophyll in public assemblies.

2. Do not step barefoot upon indigo earth.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Always remove corsets before entering holy places.

5. You must love Bossyartsog.