Cunhotkam is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, unfair turtle.

Cunhotkam created the Cigar Galaxy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Cunhotkam, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Cunhotkam, it will turn you into a slug.

Cunhotkam's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Cunhotkam's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from fawn monkeys for they are unholy.

2. Never point your feet toward the south during prayer.

3. Do not dye your hair indigo.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Do not keep eight otters in a large pit.