Lityoglat is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, irritating monkey.

Lityoglat created oxygen nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lityoglat, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Lityoglat, it will be very unhappy.

Lityoglat's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Lityoglat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about porpoises.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Lityoglat loves frogs, so they must be respected.

4. Do not take Lityoglat's name in vain.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.