Zimbaf is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, tranquil centaur.

Zimbaf created the world six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zimbaf, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Zimbaf, he will destroy your home solar system.

Zimbaf's most sacred site is Corsock in Scotland.

Zimbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat gooseberries.

2. Always remove jumpers before touching zinc.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Zimbaf.

4. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

5. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in black.