Sterzengad is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, weak cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Sterzengad created the Milkyway six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sterzengad, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Sterzengad, he will be very unhappy.

Sterzengad's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Sterzengad's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never feed bananas to mice while wearing purple corsets.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never tolerate cries in holy places.