Sakpodmadlig is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, unjust dryad.

Sakpodmadlig created a quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Sakpodmadlig, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Sakpodmadlig, he will turn you into a puffin.

Sakpodmadlig's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Sakpodmadlig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never feed lemons to pigs while wearing orange tights.

3. You must love Sakpodmadlig.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Sakpodmadlig.

5. Do not speak sacred words in winter.