Flabarfdogwip is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, narcissistic snail.

Flabarfdogwip created the Large Magellanic Cloud seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flabarfdogwip, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Flabarfdogwip, she will be mildly annoyed.

Flabarfdogwip's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Flabarfdogwip's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear blue.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not wear violet clothing.

4. Do not eat lemons.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate tortoises.