Likkopcemfon is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, unthinking deer.

Likkopcemfon created a down quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Likkopcemfon, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Likkopcemfon, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Likkopcemfon's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Likkopcemfon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Run away if seven hamsters approach from the north.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.