Tindogsas is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, able meerkat.

Tindogsas created the Virgo Supercluster nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tindogsas, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Tindogsas, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Tindogsas' most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Tindogsas' Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Erect a giant iron sculpture of Tindogsas in the centre of the settlement.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always check lakes for frogs.

5. Do not kill voles.