Ponrulkapapp is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, tranquil wyrm.

Ponrulkapapp created bats five billion years ago.

If you believe in Ponrulkapapp, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Ponrulkapapp, she will destroy your home planet.

Ponrulkapapp's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Ponrulkapapp's Holy Commandments

1. Always store bananas above ground.

2. Never speak of chaos in the presence of children.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate cats.

4. Put Ponrulkapapp first in all things.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.