Ratbigfob is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, calm narwhal.

Ratbigfob created the world three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ratbigfob, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Ratbigfob, she will jump up and down on your head.

Ratbigfob's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Ratbigfob's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep six turtles in a large pit.

2. Never feed cherries to capybaras while wearing red coats.

3. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Do not contemplate spacetime during the night.

5. Never cross mountains at dawn.