Arpvenbom Rowbonkjarn is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, caring owl.

Arpvenbom Rowbonkjarn created Europe nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Arpvenbom Rowbonkjarn, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Arpvenbom Rowbonkjarn, it will destroy your home solar system.

Arpvenbom Rowbonkjarn's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Arpvenbom Rowbonkjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Heed all signs.

3. Run away if six gulls approach from the south.

4. Do not eat peas.

5. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.