Catrowgab Sidkomnillbod Bassaf is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, annoying wolf.

Catrowgab Sidkomnillbod Bassaf created time and space three billion years ago.

If you believe in Catrowgab Sidkomnillbod Bassaf, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Catrowgab Sidkomnillbod Bassaf, she will turn you into a tree.

Catrowgab Sidkomnillbod Bassaf's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Catrowgab Sidkomnillbod Bassaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your arms.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate squirrels.

3. Always face the east before speaking sacred words.

4. Pray only in firelight.

5. Do not cook food in pots.