Karlegwit is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, deceitful hedgehog.

Karlegwit created matter nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Karlegwit, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Karlegwit, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Karlegwit's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Karlegwit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never write about ultrasonics.

5. Do not speak about bananas.