Dinpagfasdan is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, vain bat.

Dinpagfasdan created the Virgo Supercluster four years ago.

If you believe in Dinpagfasdan, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Dinpagfasdan, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Dinpagfasdan's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Dinpagfasdan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never hurt moths.

3. Do not speak sacred words in summer.

4. Erect a giant indigo sculpture of Dinpagfasdan in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never go into cyan rooms.