Wonnillist is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, vain dugong.

Wonnillist created an atom four million years ago.

If you believe in Wonnillist, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Wonnillist, it will turn you into a rock.

Wonnillist's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Wonnillist's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Wonnillist.

2. Always check lakes for frogs.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. You must pray to Wonnillist seven times a day.