Bissteenbum is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, staggering cat.

Bissteenbum created the Cigar Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bissteenbum, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Bissteenbum, she will turn you into a sheep.

Bissteenbum's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Bissteenbum's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Never cross forests at midnight.

3. Never sing in the presence of geese.

4. Always help otters in need.

5. Always count to seven before sleeping.