Gesslarnbit is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, resourceful narwhal.

Gesslarnbit created humankind six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gesslarnbit, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Gesslarnbit, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Gesslarnbit's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Gesslarnbit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about wheat.

2. Never hop near whales.

3. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Do not shave your neck.

5. Always help pigs.