Vegbunzig is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, cheerful chinchilla.

Vegbunzig created Mount Everest eight million years ago.

If you believe in Vegbunzig, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Vegbunzig, he will destroy your favourite star.

Vegbunzig's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Vegbunzig's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention turtles.

2. Always make sure there are no dogs in a building before entering it.

3. Always check lakes for frogs.

4. Learn five new languages a year.

5. Do not stand on grass.