Cadfadhad is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, tranquil cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Cadfadhad created carbon eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Cadfadhad, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Cadfadhad, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Cadfadhad's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Cadfadhad's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from gray seals for they are unholy.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Shun those given to vanity.

4. Do not eat beans.

5. Do not trade with those who eat lentils.