Vongovcum is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, fussy raccoon.

Vongovcum created vertebrates three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vongovcum, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Vongovcum, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Vongovcum's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Vongovcum's Holy Commandments

1. Always help birds.

2. Hide from turquoise snails for they are unholy.

3. Never write about stars.

4. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Never prepare onions during winter.