Badmutleg is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, resourceful salamander.

Badmutleg created the Sun four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Badmutleg, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Badmutleg, she will turn you into a mole.

Badmutleg's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Badmutleg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not study deoxyribonucleic acid on holy days.

2. Never eat apples on fasting days.

3. Never talk about gravity near tortoises while wearing magenta coats.

4. Always cleanse oil with water.

5. Never laugh in holy places.