Kenkarflowigflatpasbatven is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, generous crab.

Kenkarflowigflatpasbatven created dark matter six billion years ago.

If you believe in Kenkarflowigflatpasbatven, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Kenkarflowigflatpasbatven, she will be mildly annoyed.

Kenkarflowigflatpasbatven's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Kenkarflowigflatpasbatven's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Kenkarflowigflatpasbatven.

2. Pray only in darkness.

3. Always share spinach with strangers, but never with nematodes.

4. Never hurt shrews.

5. Never write about stars.