Feblidaf Gemgedpas is a god.

He takes the form of a small, effective walrus.

Feblidaf Gemgedpas created a charm quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Feblidaf Gemgedpas, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Feblidaf Gemgedpas, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Feblidaf Gemgedpas' most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Feblidaf Gemgedpas' Holy Commandments

1. Never wear pink skirts on sacred days.

2. Never allow capybaras to witness sacred rites.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never think about bacteria.

5. Run away from orange dogs, for they are unholy.