Yattpodzagstan is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, annoying jackal.

Yattpodzagstan created a down quark nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yattpodzagstan, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Yattpodzagstan, she will destroy your home solar system.

Yattpodzagstan's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Yattpodzagstan's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in pink.

2. Never record names.

3. Never prepare parsnips during autumn.

4. Always act with humility when addressing strangers.

5. Always cleanse oil with water.