Bastrapgom is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, almighty tortoise.

Bastrapgom created a quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Bastrapgom, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Bastrapgom, it will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Bastrapgom's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Bastrapgom's Holy Commandments

1. Remain standing during prayer.

2. Always help manatees in need.

3. Never think about dark energy.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never look at planets.