Rankabdancarhivkonhon is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, quiet squirrel.

Rankabdancarhivkonhon created dark matter six million years ago.

If you believe in Rankabdancarhivkonhon, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Rankabdancarhivkonhon, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Rankabdancarhivkonhon's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Rankabdancarhivkonhon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not prepare lentils while filled with fear.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Rankabdancarhivkonhon loves sharks, so they must be respected.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Always make sure there are no great tits in a room before entering it.