Yamlamomin Gengunnel is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, witless manatee.

Yamlamomin Gengunnel created humankind three billion years ago.

If you believe in Yamlamomin Gengunnel, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Yamlamomin Gengunnel, he will turn you into a sheep.

Yamlamomin Gengunnel's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Yamlamomin Gengunnel's Holy Commandments

1. Do not utter prayers while touching silver.

2. Do not speak sacred words in spring.

3. Always share lentils with strangers, but never with whales.

4. Put Yamlamomin Gengunnel first in all things.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.